I'm back home after a long weekend in Canada with the hubby and his bagpipe band. All day Saturday and Sunday, we were at different Highland Games (Maxville and Montreal) and all I ate was junk. I asked a friend why the highland games only serve bad food and his response was because if they served good food it wouldn't be a highland games. Given that these events are usually in the middle of nowhere, you're pretty much stuck with the slim pickings of what's available at the event. This includes meat pies, fries, chips, ice cream, candies, and even haggis.
I had given some thought to bringing my own food and trying to be healthy with it all. I even packed some chicken and green beans in my cooler. However, our room had no refrigerator and there wasn't much time in the morning to run over to the grocery store for clean eats. So I made do with the food at the games and decided to not stress about it. The one thing I did stress a little about was staying hydrated. I brought a gallon of water for each day and, with the exception of today, did pretty well at drinking most of it before going to bed. The stress? Worried about being caught in the car or having to resort to a port-a-potty. Fortunately, we took plenty of breaks while driving and each event had real restrooms that were easy enough to access.
Aside from eating at the games, which I did a fair amount of, I still managed to keep myself well-fed. We were out for dinner each night. I wasn't hungry, but found myself eating a good sized meal anyways. ("Found myself" as if I had absolutely nothing to do with it and it just happened to me!) Then I stocked up on British candies that I don't come across much in the States. Dolly Mixtures are my absolute favorite from when I was little, so I can't resist them. And while I'm buying those, I'll also get the currant-flavored candies which are delicious. Next thing you know, I've spent about $40 on sweets. I didn't eat them all, but now have them in a bag on the kitchen floor, waiting to be put away in the back of the cabinet for my next cheat. (I'm going to try and be disciplined - not "good" - about this.)
Now, once I get an idea in my head, it's hard to get rid of it. (This is partly why I've been fixated on my personal rendition of the Canadian national anthem, including "Oh, Canada! Whose fleece is white as snow!") A friend mentioned Tim Horton's and how amazing TimBits are. So I have to wonder, what are TimBits and why are they so amazing? Answer: Dunkin' Donuts, only better. And what better way to start the 9+ hour drive home than with a stop at Tim Horton's? Do we really need 6 donuts AND a box of 10 TimBits on top of our bagels? Of course not, but I don't want to pass up on the opportunity to experience this awesome Canadian experience, do I? I certainly could have, but my mind was set. And there's now a box of 3 donuts to take into work tomorrow for those who want them....
But I do get into this "In for a penny, In for a pound" mindset when it comes to eating off-plan. Or when it comes to eating on-plan ... when it comes to anything for that matter. I'm working to be more aware of this tendency and to see what I can do to rein it in. Hence my trying to have better balance and moderation in my life across the board. I don't HAVE to get a dessert just because we're eating out at a restaurant (which I didn't do any of the nights, and somehow this justified my eating more sweets the following day). I don't HAVE to buy something at the games, just because I'm there (but I'll still roam around the various vendors and maybe pick up something after I've given it fair thought). I don't have to pack two books for a three-night trip, let alone the extra magazines and other types of entertainment (I stuck with two books this time, just because there was room in the suitcase for the second one).
There's a reason why I understand OCD so well and specialize in treating it - I have my own OC tendencies or traits. I don't see this as a good or bad thing, it just is what it is. The important piece is what I do with this insight, knowledge, and understanding. Do I let it run over me or do I get it to work for me? I think I've found ways to work this aspect of my personality to my advantage, but I certainly see how it can work against me at times as well. It has helped me be very successful in my fitness and diet efforts, but it has also contributed to my weight-gain in the past. It gets me on the elliptical, but it also keeps me at work much later than necessary. I've been able to accomplish quite a bit in my life, but I'm left feeling like I "should" be doing more. The more I understand myself, the better-balanced and happier/healthier/more fulfilled I can be.
Understanding yourself is like laundry, it's never truly done!
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