Back in the Groove

New Year's is often a time when people pledge to turn over a new leaf, to reinvent themselves, to "fix" things.  I struggle with the concept of "resolutions" because I feel they have a negative spin.  The message is that you're "broken" or that you've been doing something wrong.

Instead, I prefer to identify aspirations that I hold for myself.  How can I improve on myself?  How can I be a better me?  It's not that there's something wrong, but more that I can enhance what I've already got established as a foundation in my life.

How does this relate to my weight and physical fitness?  I know what I can do to manage my weight and to stay physically fit.  I know that these two elements are closely intertwined with my overall ability to take care of myself.  I know that when I don't make them a priority in my daily life, I feel worse (physically, mentally, emotionally).

However, it's crucial that there be a balance between weight/fitness and the rest of life.  Being overly focused on eating and exercising has created distance (or at the very least tension) in some of my relationships.  While a life that's trim and fit definitely feels good, it feels even better to share that life with someone else.

So where is this all going?  I'm not going to set a goal of "lose X pounds" or "fit into size __ jeans" - those are the consequences of actions, not the framework for living life.  The emphasis is on behaviors and relationships.  What can I do?  What choices can I make?  How do these reflect my values and priorities?

• Be consistent with my exercise routine
• I typically do strength-training once a week with a personal trainer.  I'd like to do this twice a week, but I don't think scheduling and finances would allow for that at this time.  As the year progresses, I'll reassess this.
• Cardiovascular exercise 4-5x/week.  I have an elliptical at home, so that makes it much easier.  I've been exercising in the morning so that it doesn't take time away from my husband in the evenings (relationship aspect).  I've slipped with the cardio a bit recently, with holiday scheduling, cold mornings, and being very tired.  Just getting on the elliptical, even if just for 30 minutes is good.  Besides, once I'm on the machine for 30 minutes, I might as well go for 60!
• Be consistent with my nutritional program
• I HATE the word "diet" - so many negative connotations!  There's the way I eat, it's a strict meal plan designed by my trainer.  I work hard to follow the plan, but I also want to allow the flexibility to accommodate "real world" events.
• I plan to eat "clean" 6 days a week, allowing for a "cheat meal" once a week.  This would allow for a date with my husband or an evening out with friends.  I'd even be willing to work in another "cheat meal" on an as needed basis.
• I think the big piece here is to maintain practical expectations about eating.  Food is there to sustain my body so it can do the things it needs to do.  There are strong cultural and social factors influencing food and eating behaviors.  I can't control for all of them and I don't want to be robotic when it comes to food.  Again, it's all about balance.

So here I am, nearing the end of January 1st, 2011.  How do things look so far?

• I weighed in at 153.8 this morning, which was higher than I expected but not surprising
• I believe I weighed in around 165 on 1/1/10, and my highest weight ever was 189, so I know I'm not back to square one.
• My lowest weight was 137.2, back in September 2010.  I think that I would be able to lose the 15 pounds, given the behaviors that I've outlined above, but I'm okay if I don't.  The focus is on sustainable behaviors and choices rather than a yo-yo cycle.
• Eating clean so far.  I'm contemplating posting my food logs (where I typically just e-mail them to my trainer).  My primary concern here is the perceptions of these food logs, keeping in mind that they were developed for me by my trainer and aren't meant to be followed by everyone.  In fact, I strongly advocate against people adopting someone else's eating plan without some guidance or education.
• Exercised today and felt pretty good with it.  Again, I have some reservations about how my exercise regime may be evaluated by others.  It works for me and I'm not asking anyone else to follow it.  I was on the elliptical for 90min, mostly at level 4, keeping a good pace with my heart-rate at about 140 for the duration.  I wear a Polar heart-rate monitor when I exercise and typically aim for a minimum 600 calories burned per workout.  For a weekly total, I aim for 3600-4000 depending on the number of workouts I have and their intensity.

So here's to a happy and healthy 2011!  Eating clean, making positive choices for myself, and not becoming a Food and Fitness Nazi in the process!

Cheers!