On The Defensive

Sometimes I feel as though I'm defending my food and fitness choices to other people.  So I ask you:

• If I kept Kosher, would you ask me to justify why I don't eat bacon?  Would you be telling me that I should eat pork or that there's something wrong with my excluding it from my diet?

• If I were a recovering alcoholic, would you question my decision to not imbibe?  Would you encourage me to have just one drink?  After all, what's the harm of just one?

• If I had diabetes, would you ask about my blood glucose levels?  Would you imply that I'm being overly rigid by turning down the slice of cake for dessert?  Couldn't I balance it out with some medication or something?

• If I could experience an allergic reaction to a particular food, would you question my vigilance when asking about an item on the menu?  Would you downplay the experience of anaphylaxis?  Maybe you'd think that I just being picky and saying it's an allergy?

• If I were vegan, would you challenge my choice to not consume, use, or eat any animal products?  Would you insist that I couldn't be healthy or meet my nutritional needs by eating this way?  Would you make assumptions about my political views based solely on that?

• If I were Mormon, would you examine my abstaining from caffeine and alcohol?  Would you try to serve me something with caffeine or alcohol, to see if you could pull one over on me?

• If I were Hindu, would you undermine my refraining from eating beef?  Would you challenge my belief that the cow is sacred and can't be eaten?

These are just some of the circumstances I could think of where, more often than not, people would accept an individual's dietary guidelines and not ask any questions.  Or perhaps they might ask questions, but along the lines of "How is vegan different from vegetarian?" Or "Is decaf tea okay or does it need to be herbal tea?" There's a difference between curiosity and challenging.  I'm very receptive to people who want to understand why particular choices are made and who ask questions as a way of furthering this understanding.  But I have less patience when these questions cross the line and adopt a critical tone.

So why do some people think it's okay to question and challenge my dietary choices?  If they're not my medical doctor or nutritionist, what standing do they have to pass judgment on my menu options?  Is there really such a difference between choices made based on religious beliefs or health needs and the choices that I make?  They're all driven by similar things: choosing foods that nurture the body, eschewing those that don't.  Some choices are more clearing identifiable - the diabetic can measure the impact that different foods have on blood sugar, the alcoholic can experience (or be told about) the impaired judgment and disruptive behaviors.  Other choices are accepted as a demonstration of one's faith, something that is rarely challenged.

I could talk about how fitness is my religion and my body is my temple, but I'd have a hard time keeping a straight face.  I would definitely expect some eye-rolling and snickering in that conversation.  While health and fitness are important to me, but I wouldn't escalate them to the level of a religion.  With that in mind, I would ask that my "belief system" be respected, even if it's something that other people don't hold to or believe in themselves.

I'm very open about my eating and exercising, but I'm not looking to convert anyone.  I'm happy to explain my choices to others, but I'm not going door-to-door looking to share the "Good Food" with my neighbors.  The results from my choices and action are quite apparent, but I'm not standing out on a street corner, proselytizing about the power of clean eating.

How would interactions be different if people took a minute and consider the other side of the conversation?  What if they questioned their motivation for approaching the topic and asking these things?  What if they were attentive to their word choices, tone, and attitude?  I'm not saying that other people are entirely responsible for my feeling as though I'm on the defensive.  Some of it is also related to my own insecurities and sensitivities.  But I do think that people in general more receptive to a discussion when it feels like a conversation as opposed to a judging.

So you want to know what's going on?  Let's talk about it.

Food Log: 

• Meal 1 
• 4 egg whites and 2 eggs with salsa 
• Meal 2
• 2oz chicken
• Green beans 
• Meal 3
• Tablespoon of peanut butter 
• Meal 4
• 4oz chicken
• Asparagus
• Meal 5
• Protein shake 
• Tablespoon of peanut butter

Exercise: 

• Time:  60 minutes total-body workout with the trainer
• Calories:  375+

Today's Weigh-In: 142.6