I had a tough time today, and not for any particular reason. I guess I could attribute it to PMS. While I often I feel like that's making an excuse, there may be something to it, given how tearful I've been. I worked hard to stay positive and to coach myself through the day. With some insights, support from my husband, and the knowledge of accountability, I was able to make my way through the day and end on a good note.
It all started with not sleeping very well last night. I had some disturbing dreams and kept waking up before the alarm went off. Once I woke up and got out of bed, I was able to get up and moving but had low energy and wasn't moving with any real energy. I decided to exercise and was just about to change into my workout clothes when my dad called.
Generally, conversations with my parents are pretty good. This morning's conversation? Not so much. While it wasn't a bad talk, I found myself getting frustrated - particularly when I tried to explain some of my worries about seeing the nephrologist and some past health issues. I didn't feel misunderstood, but I definitely didn't feel understood. I was choking up just trying to explain the most simple and straightforward facts. This morning talk just fed into my already-crummy mood. It was difficult to explain to my husband that I wasn't upset, depressed, or angry after the phone call - I just feel like crying and there's no particular reason why. After the conversation with my dad and the subsequent talk with my husband about the conversation, exercising before work was out of the question.
I felt "blah" with a higher weigh-in as well. While I try to not read too much into the numbers, I do get a tad demoralized when the numbers creep up despite my doing all the "right" things. (This is where I think the PMS element has some validity, as I'm getting my period in a few days.)
So I got myself ready for work and rolled into the office (a few minutes late). The staff meeting included pizza and it was tempting to grab a slice or two (or three or four). Instead, I reminded myself that indulging in the pizza wouldn't erase the "blah" feelings and would actually leave me feeling worse in the long run.
I had a hard time focusing for most of the day and noticed that I was getting irritated by things that otherwise wouldn't bother me. I knew the end of the day was going to be demanding and I rallied some energy for my final appointments. It was a challenge to stay motivated because I was in meetings until 7:30 and didn't leave the office until 7:45.
At that time, I was questioning if I had the push to leave the office and drive to the gym. All I wanted to do was to head home, put on my flannel pajamas, and curl up under the covers. I took yesterday off and knew that I didn't have any physical reason to not exercise today. In addition to the planned exercise, I wanted to get the exercise in because of tomorrow's cheat meal (father-in-law's birthday dinner). I was torn between going to the gym (which would take more time, with driving back and forth) and going home (which would be more convenient but would necessitate walking by the couch and resisting it's call). I called my husband and, while it wasn't pleasant for him, he was still at work. That helped me feel a little less guilty about taking the extra time by going to the gym, which guaranteed getting a workout.
Climbing onto the elliptical was enough to boost my mood. Chugging away, I felt better and better with each passing minute. I often refer to exercise as my therapy and today was a prime example of this. I got my full workout in, reached all my goals, and felt worlds better walking out of the building. I took a steaming hot shower and enjoyed a clean dinner with my husband. It was a later night than usual, but I needed it to take care of myself.
I'm glad I was able to pull myself through the day. It started out tough and it would have been really easy to continue with the negativity and allow it to pull me down. Instead, I focused on my choices and was determined to keep with my goals. Successes like this are a great reinforcer!
Food Log:
It all started with not sleeping very well last night. I had some disturbing dreams and kept waking up before the alarm went off. Once I woke up and got out of bed, I was able to get up and moving but had low energy and wasn't moving with any real energy. I decided to exercise and was just about to change into my workout clothes when my dad called.
Generally, conversations with my parents are pretty good. This morning's conversation? Not so much. While it wasn't a bad talk, I found myself getting frustrated - particularly when I tried to explain some of my worries about seeing the nephrologist and some past health issues. I didn't feel misunderstood, but I definitely didn't feel understood. I was choking up just trying to explain the most simple and straightforward facts. This morning talk just fed into my already-crummy mood. It was difficult to explain to my husband that I wasn't upset, depressed, or angry after the phone call - I just feel like crying and there's no particular reason why. After the conversation with my dad and the subsequent talk with my husband about the conversation, exercising before work was out of the question.
I felt "blah" with a higher weigh-in as well. While I try to not read too much into the numbers, I do get a tad demoralized when the numbers creep up despite my doing all the "right" things. (This is where I think the PMS element has some validity, as I'm getting my period in a few days.)
So I got myself ready for work and rolled into the office (a few minutes late). The staff meeting included pizza and it was tempting to grab a slice or two (or three or four). Instead, I reminded myself that indulging in the pizza wouldn't erase the "blah" feelings and would actually leave me feeling worse in the long run.
I had a hard time focusing for most of the day and noticed that I was getting irritated by things that otherwise wouldn't bother me. I knew the end of the day was going to be demanding and I rallied some energy for my final appointments. It was a challenge to stay motivated because I was in meetings until 7:30 and didn't leave the office until 7:45.
At that time, I was questioning if I had the push to leave the office and drive to the gym. All I wanted to do was to head home, put on my flannel pajamas, and curl up under the covers. I took yesterday off and knew that I didn't have any physical reason to not exercise today. In addition to the planned exercise, I wanted to get the exercise in because of tomorrow's cheat meal (father-in-law's birthday dinner). I was torn between going to the gym (which would take more time, with driving back and forth) and going home (which would be more convenient but would necessitate walking by the couch and resisting it's call). I called my husband and, while it wasn't pleasant for him, he was still at work. That helped me feel a little less guilty about taking the extra time by going to the gym, which guaranteed getting a workout.
Climbing onto the elliptical was enough to boost my mood. Chugging away, I felt better and better with each passing minute. I often refer to exercise as my therapy and today was a prime example of this. I got my full workout in, reached all my goals, and felt worlds better walking out of the building. I took a steaming hot shower and enjoyed a clean dinner with my husband. It was a later night than usual, but I needed it to take care of myself.
I'm glad I was able to pull myself through the day. It started out tough and it would have been really easy to continue with the negativity and allow it to pull me down. Instead, I focused on my choices and was determined to keep with my goals. Successes like this are a great reinforcer!
Food Log:
- Meal 1
- 4 egg whites and 2 eggs with Mrs Dash and I Can't Believe It's Not Butter spray
- Meal 2
- Green beans
- Meal 3
- Protein shake
- Meal 4
- 4oz chicken
- Artichoke hearts, peas, and onions
- Meal 5
- Generous tablespoon of peanut butter
Exercise:
- Time: 65 min (60 min on elliptical, 5 min on treadmill)
- Level: Mostly Level 7, but levels aren't comparable to those on elliptical at home
- Calories: 650+
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