Yesterday I made reference to a fear of what others might think. That fear could act as a barrier to trying new things or to working toward personal goals. In addition to fear, there can be a pressure from other people. Perceived or actual - either way it can be very powerful.
External expectations can provide motivation for staying on target. I'm much more inclined to stick with my goals because of the (self-inflicted) pressure associated with this blog. I see that people are reading my posts each day and that motivates me to make choices that reflect clean eating, fitness, and an overall healthy lifestyle.
When going through a physical transformation, it's only natural that other people observe the changes. In fact, one might argue that we WANT people to take note. After all, some of the strongest external reinforcers are the compliments received from other people. However, these comments from other people can inadvertently lead to an increased sense of pressure. And sometimes other people feel that it's their right or their place to make these comments.
Sometimes, the expectations can grow too large. "I can't regain any weight because people will see." "They're expecting me to eat clean, so I can't eat a cookie." When it starts to feel like all eyes are on you and people are out to "catch" you and "punish" you for your choices, it can be overwhelming.
In my experience, these expectations are often my perceptions or interpretations - I recognize these can be somewhat distorted and are more a reflection of my own internal baggage as opposed to what those around me truly think. But sometimes there's "that person" who makes a comment without thinking or who is just trying to be "helpful" with some "constructive" comments. "You're looking pretty good. I hope you're able to stick with it." "Don't lose too much weight!" Thanks! Love you, too!
What to do in response to these pressures? It's not possible to please everyone. It's not possible to meet everyone's expectations. Not only is it not possible, it's not healthy. When I start to feel that pressure, I take a deep breath and pause. Is that message coming from me or from the outside? Is that message valid or a product of emotional baggage (mine or other people's)? And, lastly, am I doing this for myself or for someone else?
The answers aren't always clear, but then there's rarely anything that's 100% certain in life. But I generally can get a sense of the larger influences at work. If it's mostly me, I'm golden. If it's mostly them, I walk away and reassess. I'm not going to bow to the pressure unless it's coming from me!
Food Log:
External expectations can provide motivation for staying on target. I'm much more inclined to stick with my goals because of the (self-inflicted) pressure associated with this blog. I see that people are reading my posts each day and that motivates me to make choices that reflect clean eating, fitness, and an overall healthy lifestyle.
When going through a physical transformation, it's only natural that other people observe the changes. In fact, one might argue that we WANT people to take note. After all, some of the strongest external reinforcers are the compliments received from other people. However, these comments from other people can inadvertently lead to an increased sense of pressure. And sometimes other people feel that it's their right or their place to make these comments.
Sometimes, the expectations can grow too large. "I can't regain any weight because people will see." "They're expecting me to eat clean, so I can't eat a cookie." When it starts to feel like all eyes are on you and people are out to "catch" you and "punish" you for your choices, it can be overwhelming.
In my experience, these expectations are often my perceptions or interpretations - I recognize these can be somewhat distorted and are more a reflection of my own internal baggage as opposed to what those around me truly think. But sometimes there's "that person" who makes a comment without thinking or who is just trying to be "helpful" with some "constructive" comments. "You're looking pretty good. I hope you're able to stick with it." "Don't lose too much weight!" Thanks! Love you, too!
What to do in response to these pressures? It's not possible to please everyone. It's not possible to meet everyone's expectations. Not only is it not possible, it's not healthy. When I start to feel that pressure, I take a deep breath and pause. Is that message coming from me or from the outside? Is that message valid or a product of emotional baggage (mine or other people's)? And, lastly, am I doing this for myself or for someone else?
The answers aren't always clear, but then there's rarely anything that's 100% certain in life. But I generally can get a sense of the larger influences at work. If it's mostly me, I'm golden. If it's mostly them, I walk away and reassess. I'm not going to bow to the pressure unless it's coming from me!
Food Log:
- Meal 1
- 2 egg whites with peppers, onions, and salsa
- 40g oatmeal
- Meal 2
- Big salad (but I didn't finish it all)
- 2 tablespoons salad dressing (but I didn't finish it all)
- 3oz chicken
- Meal 3
- Apple
- Light cheese
- 1oz almonds
- Meal 4
- Big salad
- 2 tablespoons salad dressing
- 3oz chicken
- 40g oatmeal
- Tablespoon of peanut butter
Exercise:
- Time: 62 minutes
- Level: Level 1 for 1 minute, Level 4 for 60 minutes, Level 1 for 1 minute
- Calories: 625+
Today's Weigh-In: 143.5
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